Traditionally the groom’s responsibility includes a short and easy list that covers the basics from planning the honeymoon, hiring the band, handling the wedding day transportation and so on. And for the groom, that is where the “Wedding Planning” responsibilities USED to end! However, as many of you are already finding out, that isn’t the end, and we have listed a few things to consider and to keep in mind to make your PRE WEDDING life a bit easier and HAPPIER. This list may not apply to everyone, but we are sure that it will keep any groom out of the doghouse and more importantly, doing these top 10 things will keep your fiancé thrilled!

From here on out in the wedding planning process you should know that:

1.Do Your Homework

Find a travel agent you trust! Make sure your flights all work and all your time lines and reservations are correct! There is nothing worse then planning to romance you new wife on an island and realize you arrive to the dock after the only boat left to take you to your hotel…ON THE IS­LAND! KNOW YOUR DESTINATION. Know where you are going and know what you land to do when you get there. Nothing worse then thinking you are going some­where that all you want to do is lay on the beach to find out the beach is too rocky to use or plan a trip to sight see and get to your hotel to find out there is nothing to see. KNOW WHAT YOU BOTH WANT. Understand before booking what you each expect out of this trip. Do

2. Be Realistic

You should know now that sex on the wedding night is most likely not going to happen, and NO, this is NOT a “preview” to your sex life for the rest of your life. HOW­EVER, if you know this going in you can take the pressure of and plan for a late check out and enjoy a nice late morn­ing with each her. Avoid AM flights, avoid making early plans to meet anyone, ask for a late checkout and just plan on waking up late together if you have that extra time.Plan The Best HONEYMOON Ever. Here is where you have to fight the urge to be cheap and remember that this is the one time in your life that your going on a HONEYMOON and it should be spectacular. Remember Romance, Relaxation, Adventure, Paradise and Pleasure. Spend some time on honeymoons.com reading about great locations, great tips, great places and decide where you should go to have the best time ever! As the groom this becomes your task and we want to re­mind you to:

3. Research Romance

I know you don’t need to worry about being Romantic anymore… she said YES, but your wrong. If being roman­tic does not come to you naturally, then start researching it now! If you think you wont need it on your honeymoon , your first year of marriage and the rest of your life you are dead wrong. Romance is not about money it is about thoughts and actions. If you take a little bit of time to see what is out there to help you I think you will be thrilled to find so many useful items that will be so important to creat­ing a lifetime of memories and great moments.

1. a) Light a candle and draw her a bath.
2. b) Leave a note for her inside her purse.
3. c) Make her lunch for the day.
4. d) Fix her coffee and bring it to her in bed

4. Create Your Honeymoon Wish list Together

In order to pick a honeymoon that is important to both of you create a list that helps you understand what you both want out of this adventure and trip of a lifetime. Do you want ocean front villas, does TV matter, do you want a butler, your own private plunge pool, do you want night­life, tours, sightseeing, water sports, golf and anything else you need to know to PICK where you want to visit! The more you know about you both want the better you will be at choosing a location that will make YOU both happy

5. Play Nice.

You need to understand how stressed your fiancé is with planning this wedding and nicknaming her bridezilla is, although funny and maybe a little true, it is hurtful.Understand that women are dreaming of their wedding day from when they are little girls, to women, this day needs to be flawless and exactly as she imagines it. help her to understand in a nice way they nobody will notice that the shade of pink is slightly off on the cake and that all the butterflies didn’t all fly away in unison when re­leased doesn’t not matter as much as the rest of your life together. keep reminding each other keep your eye on the whole not donut and that in the end you have a great time and each other.

6. Be Involved

You need to make sure someone is planning her bridal shower. DO NOT ASSUME. (You don’t need to be in­volved, but keep an open ear to make sure someone has taken the lead and planning is underway.) Be sure to offer to help surprise her or take her to the party.

7. Remember Romantic Gestures

We know that this may be one of the last things you want to do but research dance classes and then suggest to your new bride you both should consider taking a dance les­son or two! She will be thrilled and you will be happy on your wedding day when you are dancing in front of a huge crowd that you managed to not to tear her dress off by stepping on it with your two left feet! think about what you want to dance to and then tell her that you’re already thinking of what songs will make a great first dance and/ or even other songs you think the band or DJ should play.Plan a surprise for the reception like fireworks, special mu­sic, write her a poem and read it to her in front of your guests, a special new gift, look up love quotes and read them to her.Write special & endearing notes to your father-in-law and mother-in-law, thanking them for everything they’ve done, especially for creating the most amazing woman in the world. Have the Best Man deliver your Bride a special gift and breakfast the morning of the wedding. Bring her home flowers just because you love her so much and appreciate everything she is doing to make this the best wedding ever!

8. Know the “No No No’s”.

You need to know that you’re not inviting your ex girl­friend to the wedding, and it is not appropriate to even ask. (OK, Mr?) You need to remember that YOUR mother is not in charge of planning the wedding! Make sure you are there to make a great BUFFER for your new bride. She is planning this big event and keep in mind that she is hear­ing thousands of demands, thoughts and opinions making her nuts. Keep anyone from ruining this wonderful time for your new ride. And NO, referring to your wife as the future anything that is ruining your life stopping your life or killing you is not funny.

9. Register Together

Yes, we know most of you hate shopping. But you are ex­pected to go with your fiancé to register, and yes this is a big deal and yes it will take hours. What helps is to make a day of it. Plan out where you are going to avoid sales or crowds and then plan to have lunch together and en­joy getting ready to set up this new life together. Keep in mind the gifts are free so enjoy this! Register for things you would never splurge for yourself and keep an open mind.If you don’t think you need any household items, then reg­ister for something you need…YOUR HONEYMOON! this is a great way to get the trip you want and any extra can be rolled into your next trip and even the one after that! Contact Twiga tours for honeymoon registry)

10. A Helpful Groom Is A Happy Groom

You SHOULD be happy and more importantly OFFER to be involved in the planning of your wedding. More times then none your new bride will say; “Thank you honey, but I have it all under control” but knowing you offered and knew what to do will set you far above the bar that is set by those men who never think to ask or don’t want to help. Not only should you offer help but go one step further by making a list of family, friends and co-workers you would like to invite. Stay organized by starting a spreadsheet with names, and addresses of guests. (Facebook, email & phone numbers do not count.) Help also by working out a wed­ding budget with your fiance and offer to call vendors to set up appointments. Taking this positive role in planning the wedding will most likely help your fiancé handle the stress that comes with planning such a big event.

1.There are five elements which make for a great wedding reception: guests that you really want to be there, amaz­ing ambiance, great food, heart felt speeches and fantastic music

2.Destination weddings can be very costly, so make sure you choose a ven­ue which has good existing infrastruc­ture, such as accommodation and kitchen. This will help with the planning, logistics and cost of the big day.

3.“ Don’t worry if you can’t afford a wedding planner, but make sure you understand all the costs involved be­fore committing to anything and don’t make emotional decisions. Only invite people that you love and who are involved in your life to your wedding,

3.Using candlelight effectively can add great ambiance to the night, but don’t think that candles can only be used on tables. Dotting plinths of candles around the room will give the space a soft romantic glow.

4.Be realistic when budgeting for flowers and decor; they are two key elements when planning a wedding,”. Also keep your venue in mind – small arrangements in a large double volume room just won’t work.

5. Incorporating framed pictures of both the bride and groom’s families on the arrival drinks table/ dessert table is a brilliant way to add a personal touch and make family and friends feel part to your spe­cial day.

6.People often underestimate the amount of space that is needed for their reception spaces. Zoning the space of a basic floor plan is an ideal way to ensure that there is adequate space

7.Cocktail style wedding are very trendy at the moment. Having interactive food stations and lounge areas are also becoming increasingly popular.

8.When it comes to food, insist on a taste test. If your venue won’t do one for you, then choose another venue.

9.If you are having your wedding outside and it’s in an area that can get quite cold at night, make sure you have outdoor heating.

10.For Snacks and welcome drinks, It works well to have at least two types each of meat and vegetarian dishes, and maybe one fish op­tion. You want to make sure that the Snacks you’ve chosen fit the setting. Taste the snacks with the chef beforehand and make sure that they are easy to eat and wont mess all your guest.

12.To avoid your guests going hungry at your reception, its important to stick to a rough timing schedule

13.If you choose a buffet and have more than 75 guests make sure there are two serv­ing points . Arrange with your caterer to have less in each dish but have the dishes changed more often, to ensure the food always looks appetizing.

14.Wedding are expensive events . Even if you are on budget, stay away from a cash bar. Instead, you could offer fresh healthy juic­es . Your guests will appreciat

15.The most important ques­tion to ask your DJ when you first meet with him is if there is backup equipment and another Dj available, ( in case of) unforeseen problems on the day.Also check how many weddings the DJ has done-don’t select a DJ who has not played at least 30 weddings.It ( also) really helps if you can provide a playlist of songs you’d like to hear.

16.To get the music right for quite a mixed crowd of old and young people, try to find a middle ground: party classics or 80’s classics usually work. Also tend to bounce around be­tween genres playing two or three songs from one style and then swapping over to something else.

17.Don’t think that a Dj is your only option when it comes to music at your reception. You could have a string quarter or guitarist per­haps, but make sure you have another option so that guests don’t get bored of same sound for hours. You can even use your iPod if you’re on a budget- just make sure you put some thought and effort into the playlist.

18.To ensure you spend the maximum amount of time with your guest at your recep­tion, ask your photographer if you can do all your couple shots in the morning. That way only family pictures need to be taken after the ceremony, which will take less time. This is a good option if you have lots of overseas gust who you want to catch up with.

Dream destination; you’ve found it, in fact it had been way before you met your fiancée!

You always knew this is where you were going to tie the knot. For some it’s purely sentimental, “I always wanted a beach wedding” explains Nancy a bride as seen on my dream wedding married away with toes deep in the sand of the Indian Ocean. Some brides are living their fairytales by flying all the way to the South Coast for their nuptials , “it’s the need to be unique, Nairobi weddings have become so monotonous, I have been to the same venues for my friends’ wedding in the past three years. I simply cannot wed here” she concludes with such unswaying finality.

As Marion Obura, proprietor and planner at Majestic Events concedes, “ people chose to get married away for a myriad of reasons and every destination wedding comes with its own special experience” The former Samantha Wedding Members Business graduate explains from her years of experience gained in the wedding/event management world.

She also echoes a common sentiment by brides citing urban fatigue as one of the main reasons why most couples opt to take off and exchange vows in a less familiar location, “Naivasha, Mt Kenya and the South Coast tops the list-both for their scenic views and the unique experience they offer to both couple and guests.”

But while most may regard destination weddings as cause for otherwise unplanned vacations and dive on heads on; Marion notes that for a planner, you must keep in mind that this is work like any other and keep it professional, “your main goal is to save your client money, time and effort or energy they would have used/incurred in your absence.”

Religious ceremonies differ according to faith and can be conducted in your place of worship or your chosen ceremony venue. For details on your religious ceremony, contact your local minister as the procedures differ. Different faiths have different requirements that you should meet before you are eligible to have your ceremony at a particular religious venue.

In the Christian faith, regular church attendance isn’t always essential but some churches insist on it. Be sure to work closely with your minister or registrar by getting their approval for anything you want to add to the service at each stage of the process. In most cases the officiate will outline the service procedure and you can decide on how to personalize your marriage ceremony for example if you want something more individual like a special reading. The length or content depends entirely on you, depending on the kind of ceremony you will have.

Roman Catholic

The Catholic Church requires hefty marriage preparation. First, it requires both of you to be baptized and if possible one of you confirmed. When you go see the priest for the first time, he will ask to see your baptism certificates and fill a form giving details of your birth and occupation. If you are not a member, he will require a letter from your parish priest and for three consecutive Sundays, the banns, or public announcement of your intention to marry be read out in church. The marriage must then take place within three months. If you’ve been married before, your challenge is pretty daunting. Technically, it is impossible to marry in the Roman Catholic Church if your spouse is still alive. Even a civil divorce will not do the trick. You must receive an annulment of your previous marriage. The annulment procedure is complicated and intimidating, requiring a great deal of paperwork on the part of the person applying. It can cost quite a lot, too. (Note though, that a previous marriage that did not take place within the church does not require an annulment. From the church’s point of view, a civil- ceremony marriage that ends in divorce was never a marriage in the first place.) The Catholic Church will sanction a marriage between a Catholic and a non-Catholic providing all of the Church’s concerns are met and one of you is a confirmed catholic. Contrary to popular belief, it is not necessary, for say, a protestant person to convert to Catholicism in order to wed in a Catholic ceremony.

If you don’t have to worry about any of this congratulations. You may move to the next step; pre-marital counseling also known as Pre-Canal. This required counseling is some of the most extensive marriage preparation work that you can undertake. What can you expect from a Pre-Canal? A lot of talking between you, your groom, and your priest about your religious convictions and important marriage issues, workshops with other engaged couples and even some compatibility quizzes. If you need to go through pre-marital counseling, contact the church soon for their scheduled meetings. Group counseling programs (where many couples meet for a series of evenings or a weekend retreat) are scheduled throughout the year.

Over time, new ideas have developed and wedding arches have become widespread. Aside from the elegant simplicity it adds to a wedding, an arch is the grand centerpiece for a vow exchange and binding together of a bride and her groom.

There are arches of different colours, material and sizes and the simple decorating ideas can turn one into a sight to behold.

Contrary to belief, wedding arches are not only ideal for outdoor weddings but also indoor wedding ceremonies.

Arches are tasteful, wondrous and fairytale like and add a sensual romantic mood to a wedding ceremony.

There is an arch for every theme; for the rustic forest themes, one can use a metallic arch decorated with wild flowers or rustic wood draped with sheer fabric.  Whether it is an indoor ceremony or an outdoor ceremony, you can never go wrong with a wedding arch.